Sunday, May 31, 2009

Part 2: Swearing Implies the Lack of Intelligence?

   Hey. What can I get you? There you go, hope that suits your fancy.  What's that? What's so great about pubs? Let me tell you. 
   One of the greatest things about pubs is the option to spend time with friends and loved ones.  For some, it is a time to drink and be drunk, while for others it is a time to relax.  Some tend to believe that being severely drunk at a bar is tolerable.  Well, it ain't and those who decide to go that far will be asked to leave and if that doesn't work, I'll kick their butts out.  Fortunately it wasn't one of those nights.  Instead, a group of guys came in with smiles and laughter.  As they sat at their chosen tables, I walked over and took their orders.  In seconds I was on my way to gathering the appropriate beers.  As I served the select few that came in I couldn't help but notice the manners that these men had. They were polite, curtious, kind, and respectfully honest.  Another thing grabbed my attention though; it was how they spoke.  In the three hours that they visited, playing pool, playing cards, and watching baseball, not a single swear word was uttered.  I could not help but realize how intelligent each individual sounded. Most people, when they can't find the right words to say, usually curse.  If I may, allow me to give you an example. "Dude, that chick is so  f*%$*#*  hot, and she's a  f*%$*#*  b%$#!  who is dumber than a  f*%$*#*  lame  a$$  door knob!" Those who wish to sound more intelligent may wish to try this, "That woman is quite beautiful; unfortunately her personality is dreadful and her intelligence is somewhat of a disappointment." Is sounding "cool" more important than showing others the intelligence that God has blessed us with?  As a bar tender, I better know what I am doing and if not others will see my error and refuse to attend my pub. Look at it this way, when you buy a new car, is it better to leave the wheels on while driving, or is it more "cool" to drive without them? If you have common sense, you will have picked the first option.  So why not apply the same reasoning to language skills?
   There is not a day that goes by that swearing enters the pub and I'll admit it, I do fall into that category.  Yet, seeing those men, sit'n at the table enjoying their time, I will be sure to work twice as hard to avoid sounding like an unintelligent fool.  Don't worry about not sounding "manly" enough because being manly is not defined by swearing, getting drunk, drooling over women, burping and farting as loud as you can.  It is about protecting the ones you love and caring for them.  It is about enjoying each others company. It is about hard work.  It is about standing up for what you believe in.  It is about doing what is right whether you like it or not.  It is about going out of your way to help a random stranger. It is about showing others the grace of God through actions.  It is about showing who God is through the Word.
  As a bar tender, you tend to think deeply about such events, not all the time mind you, but often.  Maybe this is why in the movies bar tenders seem to have all the answers, or a way to guide them there.  
   Who needs a toilet for epiphanies when you have a bar that serves beer?

Part 1: Opening Night


   Lately, I have been wondering how awesome it would be to own my own bar.  Not just any bar mind you, but one with more of a medieval atmosphere.  Don't fear, there would definitely be big screen TV's for sports and the like.  Oh yeah, and one other thing, smoking will be allowed.  I hate cigarettes, I tolerate cigars, and I love the smell of pipes.  In my life time I have only smoked the occasional cigar and pipe and please keep in mind I have not made a habit of this and strongly agree that IT IS BAD FOR YOU...but so is drinking.  In America today, the rights and freedoms of the average American citizen are being ripped away by foolish politicians.  Being able to smoke in public places is one of them!  Since I have been involved with a community theater, I have been attending a certain bar with several friends.  It was one of the few places where smoking was still allowed...until tomorrow.  The government isn't stepping on our toes, they're stepping on our faces and rubbing it in!  What right do they have to take away our freedoms?  Answer. They don't! This is why I would go through the hurdles of paper work, policies, phone calls, and the like to allow smoking in my pub.
   So here you are! Welcome to Kirk's Pub.  If you'd like, pull out a lighter and light that sucker and puff away.  In the mean time, I'll get you a nice cold beer. Finished? Have another one!